The Marriage Quandry

“I love being a wife and mother; I love my job, I love my house, but I can’t stand my husband.” I heard this just the other day from a friend of mine. We don’t usually go that deep but it just sort of came out, and there we were. What’s really sad is that I hear similar stories quite often.

Such a dilemma, that which I quoted above. The paradox of them all. Loving your life so much that you don’t want to walk away, but disliking the man that is your husband. Because to keep the life that you love, you must stay with the man that you don’t.

I volunteer as a “Lay Counselor” or “Mentor” (the new terminology now being used) at our church. I hear things that I don’t like hearing. Things that cause my heart to hurt on behalf of others.

My friend that I mentioned above went on to tell of her issues. They were not the everyday leave-the-toilet-seat-up, or clothes-left- where-they-had-been-discarded kind of complaints. No, she related the few sacred sins her husband had committed. Granted, her story is just one-sided, her half of the equation, as is the case in every tale of marital woe, but there are some things you can’t look past. And yet she is because she loves her life…

I could cite at least a dozen other stories with similar plot lines but I’ll spare you that for now. And I could get on my soapbox and spew for a bit, but I’ll refrain from that as well.

What I will say (for now) is this, how utterly sad to think that there are more women than not, who feel the way my friend does. How incredibly self-focused we as a society have become. And there is much to blame in this post-family 21st century culture in which we live.

On a happier note, I can think of a few couples that have not only stood the test of time and stayed together, but manage to do so with contentment; thriving all the while. My hat is off to them.

Well done I say, well done.

5 thoughts on “The Marriage Quandry”

  1. hey there,
    love your article! It is discouraging the state of marriages today. We will just have to keep marriages on the pray list! My husband and I only have 3 years under our belt but pray for a lifetime!


  2. As a newly wed (can I still say that after a year and a half?) I don’t like hearing those stories. However I do recognize how incredibly easy it is to stray apart from each other – and just in the short time I have been married! It’s almost a daily battle to spend time together what with his long work days and our two kids that typically occupy much of my energy in the evenings as the hubs is getting home.

    Thanks for the follow! I’m following back!


Leave a Comment