Saying Good-bye to Dylan

Yesterday was the memorial service for Dylan. It lasted two hours, and the church was packed to an overflow room. The visitation was a constant line of people waiting to talk with his parents. We stood in line for 30 minutes until we decided that we would be in line for at least that much longer, and there were people there, we knew, who needed to talk to them more, and who they needed to see. We were able to talk with Dylan’s older brother, and the pastor and his son who were present when Dylan died, before we left the church.

It was quite a testimony to the life Dylan led in those few short years. The church was filled with people whose lives he had touched, along with awards, trophies…even his bike sitting on dirt and gravel that had been lovingly placed on the church stage by those who loved Dylan and wanted to honor him.

It was a beautiful day yesterday. Unseasonably warm. I was constantly thinking of Dylan’s family, kept wondering what do you do after burying your son. I mean no disrespect with that statement. My heart was heavy for them.

Thinking back to my brother’s death, and knowing how very different it must be, burying a child, I know in my heart that the answer to those musings is: you do the same thing you always do…without the loved one who was as much a part of your life as air. And that is where the problem lies. How do you do those things?

People deal with loss differently. Families come to terms with their new normal in their own way. However it happens, it’s a tough road ahead. One that they won’t face alone, but hard nonetheless.

There really aren’t words to express the tragic, pain-filled events that life hands us, especially of this magnitude. But still we try…I try. My heart breaks for Dylan’s family, even with the knowledge that he has reached the mark, he is in the place that was his promise for a life well-lived, a life well-lived for others and for Christ who is his Lord.