How Can You Mend A Broken Heart?

Do you remember your first broken heart? I certainly remember mine. I thought I would die from the weightiness of it all. I remember listening to the Bee Gees’ song How Can You Mend A Broken Heart? over and over. The tenderness of a teenaged heart is something you never forget.

Mending a Broken Heart

I was 13 years old when my very first boyfriend broke up with me. I had a bit of a head’s up so it wasn’t a total shock but it still felt like my heart was broken into a thousand tiny pieces and that the pain would be with me always.

Although I couldn’t imagine ever getting over Chuck, life went on and I survived. We usually do survive our first broken hearts and the ones that follow. Life has a way of teaching us the lessons we never really asked for.  If we would have known early on that life comes with many kinds of heartaches would we have made different choices? Maybe, but if that were the case, we would have missed out on some pretty sweet things as well.

relationships, broken heart, identity, knowing your identity, knowing your identity in Christ,

Here’s what I’ve learned because of the hard things in life, if you want to be the woman God created you to be, you have to go through the difficult times. In doing so, you have the opportunity to draw close to the Father and embrace your true identity instead of letting boyfriends who dumped you dictate how you view yourself.

As a wife of an addict, you have to know who you are or you will stay stuck in the muck and mire the pain of betrayal has caused. The gamut of emotions that accompany the lie you have been living (usually unknowingly) can be incredibly overwhelming. Mending a broken heart is best done in the company of the support of other women who know what you are going through and the never-ending presence of the Father.

Knowing Your Identity

Who you believe you are deep down inside, is the biggest obstacle you will have to overcome. Not the lies or the betrayal, though those are huge hurdles to cross. If you are secure in who you are and unshakable in your identity, then the battle you are engaged in will surely be won with the help of those who care about you.

That first broken heart you experienced as a young girl (or even a not-so-young girl) laid the groundwork for things to come. How you responded then helped shape how you responded once you discovered what you never would have imagined possible in your marriage. Being the wife of an addict can do a number on your self-worth. Knowing your identity is so important. Knowing your identity in Christ makes all the difference.

Mending a broken heart takes time and it takes knowing how to grieve well. A dear friend and mentor of mine used to always say, “Those who grieve well live well” and it’s true. Allowing yourself the time to grieve, the time to experience all the phases of grief is truly the way to emotional wholeness. Grieving isn’t fun. It’s hard! But it is vital in order to move forward in a healthy way.

I am so sorry for your broken heart and all that you have had to go through, but this I know, as you allow God to work in you the things He wants to do, you will not only survive this devastating experience, but you will grow because of it and be able to help other women who find themselves where you have been.

relationships, broken heart, identity, knowing your identity, knowing your identity in Christ,

If you need an ear to listen to your story, an encouraging word, or a simple prayer, reach out and let me know how I can help you mend your broken heart.

Join our private Facebook page Atmosphere of Hope HERE. Let’s support each other through the hard times in life.

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