Deeper Things

Thinking about deeper things, about how the experiences we have often have hidden stuff than we are aware of.
lost, losing a home, deeper things lie underneath, deep feelings, losing your life, feeling displaced, making sense of events

If you’ve read my earlier posts you know that my family and I are currently living in an apartment, after having lost rental houses and our personal house as well. It has been nine months and I still seem to have my moments, hours and days of struggle. I think I’ve figured out why.

People have said to me throughout this ordeal, that I have been through worse things in my life (and I have) so this should be no big deal. I’ve struggled with that thought because on an intellectual level I get what they are saying. On an emotional level, it just wasn’t adding up. This period in my life is the hardest I have ever had to deal with so far. Deeper things are at play.

Here’s what I’ve figured out. When we left our house and moved into an apartment, I left my life behind. The life I was living is gone. Not just because I don’t live in a house. It goes much deeper than that. It’s not about where I live as long as I live with those I love. But those things I did, those things I enjoyed doing for my family in the house where we lived are gone. So not only am I adjusting to living in an apartment after 27 years, but I traded in my life as well.

Deeper things are often at the root of whatever it is we are going through that seem overwhelming.

I do know and I do understand that there are worse things going on in our world. Life is way bigger than my small piece of the journey. There is no comparison. I’m not hosting a huge pity party. I’m not looking for sympathy. Just sharing where I’m at because I think a lot of you are there too. Deeper things run hard until we are able to process the feelings tied to the events.

There are situations and circumstances that change our entire lives. We grieve, we cry and feel the feels until we get through the process knowing that deeper things will wait until we get to the place of accepting the things we could not change.

 

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