The Past Remains the Same

I came across a post from about five years ago. It’s interesting how so much has changed but so much has remained the same. The past remains the same unless you make the necessary changes to cause a different tomorrow.

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The rest of the post is the one from the past. I would still like to sit where others sit to better understand where there are, and yet I realize that I have sat in similar places, and I’ve also come to realize that to do so really isn’t necessary for me to be there and offer the only thing I have to give; validation of their experiences and memories and to be there, to listen.

I no longer live in that apartment that I mentioned below but it still remains the same that there are always people who have it worse than you do, worse than I do.

I’m in an interesting place in my life today, one I have been trying to avoid for many years. And that is just one of the things I am dealing with. I am definitely in a grieving process. As much as things have changed, they haven’t.

And now, they finally are.


All through the day I was conversing with a few distraught friends via text, phone and face-to-face. Their conflicts are real, their pain is tangible, their heartache ever-present. I wish we could sit where others are sitting and feel what they are feeling for the sake of better understanding. I wish we could sit in that seat when we don’t know what to say.

I saw the mother of one of my son’s friends. She recently lost her husband, quickly and tragically in a car accident. He left the house to go to work and he never came home. It made me think of how much I dislike living in the apartment my family currently resides. I wish I didn’t…dislike it or live in an apartment. But it hit me, this woman who I barely knew, this woman I embraced and listened to as she spoke of her journey from the physical pain of grief to the world of living without her spouse; this woman would gladly trade places with me, give up her home and all that she possessed just to have her husband back.

The past has a way of remaining the same unless you are willing to meet reality face to face and make the necessary changes that will lead to a better you and healthier relationships.


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